Friday, October 10, 2003

Well, Mr Richard D James turned up allright (that's Aphex Twin, for those who don't know). He was appearing under the name Bradley Strider, one of his early pseudonyms, and as a result it wasn't too rammed. I think half the people in there were just randoms who had wandered in off the street.

It was quite weird seeing him behind the decks in a small bar at a fairly low key night. He did his set off a laptop computer, I assume mixing mp3s or something similar. I didn't recognise any of the tunes - it was 80s tinged electro-ey kind of stuff. I couldn't work out whether it was his own music or not; perhaps it was some of each.

Unfortunately I drank too much Red Stripe and felt obliged to go and congratulate Richard for generally being very talented and for having written the tune Come on you Slags. He said thanks. I've never grown out the habit of slightly embarrasing myself at clubs by drunkenly insisting on shaking hands with DJs I admire. Never mind eh? I'm sure they're used to it.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I got back here with my housemate, scoffed pizza and then we got into one of those weird 'open' drunken conversations, not dissimilar to the one I had with my brother a few weeks ago. This time I was on about myself and self confidence. I can't remember how I got onto the subject. I'm not sure what came over me; maybe there was something in the beer.

Seriously though, I seem to have some surfacing issues. I think it could be the fact that I'm writing about myself fairly openly in this log that's making me more self aware. I suppose the fact that this is now all coming out is probably a good thing, as I've always been one for keeping things to myself.

I'd say one of the pressing issues (or symptoms?) is the fact that I've been single now for 14 months (since August 2003) and I've not really had any successes with women since then, except for getting off with a girl on New Year's Eve. It just doesn't really happen for me, and to be honest it never really has. I've only ever had one serious girlfriend (we lived together for thirteen months), and second to that my next best innings was two months.

Something must be missing in my approach but I'm not really sure what that is. It illudes me. I'm quite good looking; I'm not overweight; I have fashion sense; I'm intelligent; I'm funny and I'm still young (25). It just doesn't happen. I think it's first impressions. I don't think I make a good one. People often don't remember meeting me at all, which is really annoying. It's something I need to work on. My housemate reckons I should try homeopathy. He's tried it and claims that it's turned his life around for the better. He says he feels much better about pretty much everything since going for a few sessions, and taking one herbal tablet. It sounds crazy, but I think I might give it a shot. After all, it's only cost him about £100 and that's a small price to pay if it really works.

Anyway, I was back to my jolly old self today. I got quite a lot of work done for a couple of clients, and they were both really pleased. Unfortunately I've failed to make any progress on my brother's website this week. Maybe I'll do some tomorrow. I stayed in tonight and watched Dragnet on video. It's a cheesy 80's cop movie with Dan Ackroyd and Tom Hanks, and thus was quite entertaining. I wish the PS2 was working again though, missing the DVDs and SSX Tricky.


No comments: